Africa or America?

Africa or America? That is my dilemma and prayer right now. Lord, what is your will for my life? What is the path you are leading me on?

I am hearing from a number of people, "This is tailor made for you", "This is the chance of a lifetime", "This is God's desire for you". And yet, on the other side of the spectrum I hear, "I think you're to close to your family", "You would miss out on too much", "I don't think you will last". So I sit and pray for wisdom. I want to hear the voice of the Lord. I want to know His will for my life.

I think about my friends in Hoedspruit. Benedict, Renee, Leon, Lettie, Ricu, Melody, Zanette and countless others. I think of the possibility of seeing them on a regular basis. I think about being able to do life together.

I think about my friends in Spring. Ericha, Karen, Jeff, Paul, Bethany, Colton, Brandi and countless others. I think about what it would be like not to have their encouragement and randomness every day. I think about what I would miss out on. I think about how much I would miss them.

I think about my family. Mom, Dad, Josie, Kiana, Jacob, Kayla, Justin & Rachel and their baby, Jason, James & Sherry with their four, Papa & Tutu. I think about all the firsts I would miss with the twins. I think about them forgetting me. I think about all the "life" things I'd miss with Josie & Kiana. I think about missing the first year of Baby Tinnel's life. I think about the many talks I have with mom and what missing that would be like. I think about the times I spend with dad and not having those.

I think about ministry. In South Africa I would have constant ministry helping Lettie devolep 24/7 prayer throughout Hoedspruit. I would help Chad & Vickie in other nations of Africa ministering to Jr. High and High schoolers about abstinence. I would help be the organization for the teams that came in and making sure everything works out. In Texas I help keep the 24/7 prayer room functioning.

Lord, please give me a clear sign where you want me to spend 2010. Help me discern your voice over the voices of others. Give me peace in either decision.